GSS Fadan Kaje Old Students' Association, CLASS OF '82

Tips and Exercises

on

How to Give Your Life A Meaning!

“Everything that you want in life is on the other side of fear and discipline."

Looking at the Hero's Journey from the standpoint of your current life is a great self-growth exercise. Good for writers. How do you write if your life doesn't support that choice? Good for anyone else with goals. So, if you don't want to reach any goals, go somewhere else. Otherwise, this bit is gold.

Look at all three aspects of your life. Where are you on the Hero's Journey in regard to each one? For instance, you might be on the Road of Trials in your physical health (working out regularly), be in a Dark Night in your finances (overwhelmed with bills, creditors coming tomorrow, extended family responsibilities), and be Rejecting the Challenge in relationships ("what, me? I don't want a relationship...")

1. TAKING RESPONSIBILITY

The first and most important step is taking responsibility. You cannot solve anything as long as you believe it is someone else's fault. Where in your life have you blamed your current situation on genetics, society, age, or status? Where are you letting yourself off too easily?

2. REJECTING THE CHALLENGE

This is usually due to FEAR. Look to see where fear is a factor in your life. Remember: "Everything that you want in life is on the other side of fear and discipline." Fear is often a guardian at the door of your own excellence. To vanquish the negative effects of fear, practice the art of discipline.

3. ACCEPTING THE CHALLENGE

Set your goals. Begin to determine what it will cost you to achieve them. To do this, begin to search out role models, people who have achieved what you desire. What price did they pay?

4. ROAD OF TRIALS

Begin to clarify your values. In each major arena, what are the most and least important values? Rank them according to their importance. Look for conflicts: for instance, if you hold independence to be more important than intimacy, you are likely to have problems in relationships.

5. ALLIES AND POWERS

Study the relationships in your life. Use two different perspectives: first, which we were meant to be alone. If this is true, in what ways have you sold yourself out just to have intimacy? What lies might you tell yourself? Where did you get your negative patterns? Second, which we are meant to be together. If this is true, in what ways have you lied to yourself to avoid commitment to another adult human being? What lies do you tell yourself? Where did you get your negative patterns?

6. CONFRONT EVIL AND LOSE

Investigate the lack of balance in your life. After all--whatever realm of your life you avoid will offer shelter to your personal demons. It is EASY to succeed in one or two areas of life. It is murderously difficult to begin work on all three simultaneously--but once you start, it is addictive and blissful.

7. DARK NIGHT OF THE SOUL

What are your beliefs about success and failure?

Acknowledge that you will absolutely feel despair in your future. What are the best ways to break that state and get into a better mood? Do you need to broaden your relationship base? Develop friends who will know exactly what to do to brighten your mood? Find activities that will blast that negativity?

SPECIAL EXERCISE: Today, while you're in a GREAT mood, make an audiotape, telling yourself how great life is, how much you love yourself, and that you will experience ups and downs--they are a natural part of life. Then, the next time you're depressed--PLAY THE TAPE.

8. LEAP OF FAITH

The ultimate way through the Dark Night is raw faith. If you are going to lose your house and business, and you have done absolutely everything that is possible to do to save the situation and all has failed, you MUST have faith that you can survive this, and start over if possible. Only from this perspective can you turn off the panic, and see the possible solutions. The development of deep, abiding faith is crucial. In life, “every problem is a solution!”… and a means to an end!!

EXERCISE: Think back over five truly ghastly experiences in your life, and remember how dark things felt. How did you get through them? Remember: YOU ARE A WINNER! The very least of us beat out 100 billion other sperms for the job.

9. CONFRONT EVIL--AND WIN!

This is where energy comes in. Energy to win, energy to celebrate. Make a list of the energy vampires in your life: Drugs, alcohol, negative friends or acquaintances, lack of exercise, inappropriate diet, lack of sleep etc.

10. STUDENT BECOMES THE TEACHER

Where can you help someone else learn?

Where can you share your knowledge? Teaching, mentoring, study-buddies, mastermind groups--all are ways of sharing the accumulated wealth of knowledge. All are important parts of the journey. We are all students, we are all masters. Find the ways that you are each, and express them as often as possible.

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Jossy Nock (Unesco)